Sometimes, Winning Just Feels… Off

I dunno. Maybe it’s just me. Maybe I’m tired. But lately, some of these “wins” I used to chase so hard… they feel kinda hollow. Not bad, exactly. Just—off. Weirdly quiet. Like I crossed a finish line and no one noticed. Not even me.

Last week, big client I’d been following up with since, what, January?—finally signs. Should’ve been a big deal. Old me would’ve been doing cartwheels (not literally—I’ve got a bad knee). But instead, I just sat there staring at the email. No fireworks. No music. Just… me and the cursor blinking like it was judging me or something.

I think maybe we sometimes mistake momentum for meaning.

Back when I found Donald Hendon’s work, what hit me wasn’t the tactics (though they were sharp). It was his vibe—kind of old-school, sure, but real. Like he gave a damn about what actually makes people tick. Not just “how to win” but what winning actually means. Mentally. Emotionally. Like, under the hood.

He once said (I’m paraphrasing badly), that winning starts in your head. And I think mine’s been a mess lately. All noise. Less meaning.

I’ve been treating business like it’s a checklist. Hit numbers. Close leads. Automate. Track. Optimize. And yeah, that gets results. But it also drains the soul a bit if you’re not careful. At least it did for me.

Honestly, I wasn’t gonna write this. Felt too personal. Too scattered. But maybe that’s the point. Not every post needs to be polished like a LinkedIn brag fest. Sometimes a blog’s just a place to unload the mental junk drawer and hope someone out there goes, “Yeah… same.”

One of Hendon’s quieter lessons—between the lines—was that people are messy. Emotional. Illogical sometimes. And if we forget that, in business or anywhere else, we’re not actually influencing anyone. We’re just… selling to ourselves.

So, yeah. Got the client. Hit the goal. But the celebration part? Still waiting on that to show up.

Maybe next time I’ll remember to let myself feel it. Or maybe I won’t. Maybe I’ll mess it up again. But I think that’s part of it too.

If you’re reading this and wondering why your “wins” don’t feel like they used to—hey. Me too. It’s okay. You’re okay. We’ll figure it out.

That’s all I’ve got. No tips. No CTA. Just brain noise with a few links.
Thanks for sticking around.
—J.

The Power of Asking Again (Even When It Feels Awkward)

Not too long ago, I found myself in a little coffee shop off a dusty road in Cebu. The barista — probably no older than 22 — handed me my drink, smiled nervously, and asked, “Sir, would you like to try our new cinnamon roll?”

I shook my head. “Nah, I’m good.” Just wasn’t in the mood, honestly. She nodded, still smiling, and walked away.

But here’s the interesting part. A minute later, she came back. Same smile. Same question.

And this time, for no good reason at all… I said yes.

Why? I don’t even know. It wasn’t logic. It wasn’t hunger. It definitely wasn’t guilt. Maybe… maybe it was the way she didn’t push too hard. Just asked again — soft, confident, without apology.

This, oddly enough, reminded me of something Dr. Donald Hendon once talked about in one of his older trainings: the underestimated power of persistence with grace.

The Irrational Nature of “Yes”

People don’t say yes just because the offer is perfect. They say yes because the timing is a little better. Because they feel a little warmer toward you. Because their guard dropped for a second. Sometimes, they say yes because they’re tired of saying no.

Persuasion isn’t always about dazzling facts or masterful delivery. Sometimes, it’s just about asking again. Calmly. Confidently. Without shame.

Donald called this one of the “Hidden Triggers of Influence” — things you don’t see in textbooks but feel in real life. And he was right.

Real-World Example: Fundraising with Reluctant Donors

Back when I worked in fundraising, I had a donor say no to our scholarship campaign three years in a row. I gave up after the second. But my colleague — who had thicker skin than me — called him again the fourth year. And guess what?

He donated $10,000.

I asked him why. He laughed and said, “You just caught me in a good mood this time.”

This isn’t a fluke. This is human behavior. This is the magic that persuasion masters like Donald Hendon have been teaching for decades — the power of timing, emotional rhythm, and, yep, asking more than once.

Final Thought: Rejection Isn’t Final

So, here’s my message: If someone says no, that’s not a wall. It’s just a door — temporarily closed.

Try again. Not right away, not pushy. But try again. And the next time you feel silly for asking twice, remember the cinnamon roll in Cebu.

Sometimes the second ask is where the yes lives.

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Want to explore more about influence and the subtle art of persuasion? Check out this classic breakdown of why persuasion works.